Sunday, February 2, 2014

Shae's 3rd Annual Rendention of "Twas the Night Before Christmas"-Sonic Style

This is left over from Christmas.  For the last 3 years I have taken the poem "Twas the Night Before Christmas" and changed the words/inserted Sonic related names and things.  This is this past year's. 



And because I don't think I will be able to read it once this is published in a book, and also because I will forget the references, here it is typed out with notes:


Twas the night before Chrismas
When all through the state
Not a customer was stirring
Not even a cheapskate.
The fountain was all clean
By Chanel with care
In hopes that the list                                          *we have a daily cleaning list & Chanel loves a
Would be finished with flair.                                 checkoff list
Katie and Conrad were nestled                         *they are actually dating
All snug in their skates
Ready to make those tips
And do whatever it takes.
And Grandma Ikeria                                         *she is not old at all, but acts like a Grandma-Jon 
Had just got done                                             actually came up with the nickname
With taking a smoke break                               *she likes taking smoke breaks when we are slow
And making a donut run.                                   *and is forever going to get donuts
When out on the lot
There arose such a clatter                                 *'Beats' are an expensive type of head phones, 
Deandre took off his beats                                Deandre is an assistant.  I caught him wearing 
To see what was the matter.                             them one night when I showed up unannounced. 
Away to the broom                                          *Raven gets teased about being a butt kisser bc she
Raven flew like a flash,                                      calls us Mr. & Mrs. Phillips instead of just Jon &
Shouting, "here comes Mr. Phillips!                    Shae.
Tyler take out the trash!"
The reflection of his glasses 
And the white of his truck 
Gave a feeling of dread
To those making a buck.
With a handsome old driver
Feeling grumpy and sick                                   *At this point in time Jon was really sick, which
They kew in a moment                                     made him grumpy (er)
Their hustle must be quick.
When what to Big Roman's                              *Roman is an assistant, and a really BIG guy
Eyes should appear                                          Other assistants complain about him sitting at the 
But in walks his boss                                        desk a lot when Jon is not there.
So his chance to sit is unclear.
More rapid than eagles                                    *Corey is one of the sweetest people you will 
Corey's angry words came,                             ever meet.  But apparently in the afternoon after
And she shouted and hollered                          I have left and the school kids start coming in, she
And called them by name:                                she turns into a yelling/screaming beast.  Which I 
"Now Taysha! Now Ayriel!                             totally support, of course.
Now Owen and Cathy!
On Bertram! On James!                                  *Bertam really goes by Bert, only I call him Bertram
On Dawson and Sandy!"                                 *Dawson is 1 of 3 Briannas so we use last names
"You better watch your numbers!                     *The drinks get put on numbers on the counter
You're taking the wrong drinks!                       that correspond to the ticket number.  The school
If you will listen to my warning,                        kids are forever NOT paying attention to the
Our curb time will shrink!"                               numbers & taking the wrong drink. Which slows
As juicy burgers that before                             everything down.
Daniel Gonzalez will fry,                                  *Daniel is some kind of wizard in the kitchen who 
When he calls out "good job"                           makes even the most hectic, busy, crazy rush 
Your last nerve he will try.                               look easy.
So up to the speakers                                      *But he loves to get on people's nerves by
Through orders they flew                                  randomly clapping & saying "good job."
With Red Bulls, coffee, and Monsters,            *Jenn Mischler is always hyped up on caffeine.
And Jennifer Mischler too.                              And she is a total airhead.  The combination is
And then in a twinkling                                     hilarious.
They heard the door scrape                            *One of the doors the carhops go in & out of
As Shae herself entered                                  constantly makes a horrible scraping noise, even
And a sign she did tape.                                  though our maintenance guys "fix" it often.      
"New combos! New discounts!                     *I am constantly making signs to post to inform
Be nice! Be swell!                                         everyone about changes.  Everyone makes fun of me.
Tell them your name!                                     *The carhops just started having to introduce
And suggestive sell!"                                       themselves.
She came bearing cupcakes                           *I bring cupcakes for each person's bday
Because she loves a celebration.  
But stay away from her trays                          *I am a control freak on tray setting.
Or you'll receive an amputation.
Jon was dressed all in black
From his shirt to his shoes.
Taysha and James talked in the back,             *They are friends who are constantly getting in 
He did not look amused.                                 trouble for talking & a couple days before they
His frown, how depressing!                             were written up for literally just sitting at the  
His eyes, how they glared!                               break table, ON THE CLOCK, just chillin'
His ears, red from anger!
His nostrils, so flared!
He hated the late tickets, 
He loathed the Mystery Shop.
He growled at the labor, 
He yelled, "this shift is a flop!"
So Dawson spoke not a word, 
But went straight to her work,
And Tasha told them all,                                *Tasha has worked for us for about 17 years. She
"You better wipe off your smirk!"                  makes a lot of enemies bc she bosses people
Bertram got nervous,                                     around.  Again, I totally support her bossiness.
He didn't like trouble.                                   *I just LOVE Bertram & tell him all the time I am
Maybe he wouldn't let Shae adopt him,          going to adopt him, even though he is by no
He would have to burst her bubble.                means parent-less.
Tyler was in the kitchen,                               *Tyler seriously walks like an old man.
Walking like an old man,
But he just calmly made burgers,                  *And he is so calm ALL THE TIME.  Someone could
Keep Jon happy is his plan.                         be threatening to kill him & I think he would just
The handle of the candy scoop                     calmly tell them, "now let's just think about this..."
Juwan held tight in his hands,                       *Juwan once called in a complaint, just like a
While visions of skate tricks                         customer bc the candy in his blast was 'stale.' 
Danced in his plans.                                      He seriously wanted me to treat it like a real
Jamal, so tall and playful,                              complaint & replace it.  I told him that if the 
A right jolly old guy.                                      candy was stale it was bc employees like him
He wears a purple coat,                               were not flipping it correctly when
And has a twinkle in his eye.                         they added more to it when it was low & that
So Shae sings him a song                              if he wanted fresh candy he could come up 
To help the day go along.                            there, dump it out, wash the dishes, & refix
It amuses the crew,                                      it himself.  I can be sweet, but I have my limit.
And starts with, "I love you."                       *Jamal is the big guy who wears his purple school
Shakorra filled the cups                                jacket ALL THE TIME so I sing the Barney song.
And Kelley ran labor like a beast.               *I call Kelley the labor beast...bc she is...
Nelly shouted, "Order out!"                        *Nelly is an assistant who everyone complains yells  
And the playing all ceased.                          everything she says. 
So laying his hand on the side of his phone,
He saw their hard work and let out a groan .
He told them, "Hey everyone!
Listen up here.
I know I fuss a lot,
But in my heart you are dear.
I appreciate your work
And your effort day by day.
You guys are all awesome.  
That's what I want to say."
So he sprang to his truck
And as the key gave a turn,
He thought, "this crew is all right,
I'm no longer concerned."
And they heard him exclaim
As he drove out of sight, 
"You all get a raise!
No, I'm kidding. Good night!"




*Note to future self.  Not all employees are represented here.  I only included the people who signed up to bring something to the party.   Again with that sweetness limit....
*I use the word 'constantly' a lot...

1 comment:

  1. Wow you put a lot of work in this. Your employees are lucky you care about them

    ReplyDelete